Anticipation and touchy feely!

I'm not sure if I remember right, but I'm pretty sure that my boyfriend went for his STD check the day after I got my implant. It was kind of funny in a sad way - a family tragedy meant that all his family were swarming to the hospital that he was getting checked at and he was scared he was going to run into one of them. My boyfriend is unlike me in that department though, because if he did run into one of them I'm sure he'd have had no qualms about answering why he was there as "Oh, I'm here to get an STD test so I can have sex with my girlfriend". As I said in a previous post, he's the person I would be if I didn't care what people think.

He texted me when he was done and he said he should have the results in two weeks, both as a text and a letter. This was annoying because my implant would have me ready for unprotected sex in a week. By this point I was very much up for sex and counting down the days, so I wasn't best pleased that another 7 days had been added onto my countdown. Sure, we had oral and fingering to keep me satisfied, but right now I was craving something I couldn't have yet. Part of me wanted to scream about why he didn't book in for a test sooner, but in another way it was good. I'm a little paranoid, so it would help put my mind at rest that I'd left it longer than 7 days before having unprotected sex.

The days passed slowly. This is the first real time I can remember having a sex drive and wanting some action when I wasn't lying in bed with my almost naked boyfriend. He was over at my house most nights, and then one night as we'd just had tea and were in the process of getting naked again, he got the text saying he was all clear. My heart was pounding. I wasn't ready yet! We hadn't talked about it properly yet because we thought we'd have to wait two weeks! We cuddled up in bed but I felt really scared! It took me a while to calm down and realise that just because we could have sex now didn't mean that we had to. I was much happier after that. We cuddled and later we talked about sex and what would happen when I was ready. I now felt equipped for when the time came when I was ready. It's sort of embarrassing to admit now, but we arranged a signal I'd give him when I was ready for sex. I was all innocent back then, and we put this signal in place because I didn't think I'd be able to tell him that I was ready for sex! Aww, how sweet I was back then!

I think it must have been just before the weekend, because I didn't see my boyfriend for a few days after that. The next time I saw him was a Tuesday. It was the night of the final Tuesday rehearsal for the show my am dram group were putting on, and the final time me and my boyfriend were ever in the car in the car park together waiting for my bus home. I'd decided over the weekend that this was going to be the first time I touched his dick, but I forgot about my decision until about 30 seconds before we arrived in the car park. My heart raced again, but I told myself I was going to do it. Although my boyfriend was pretty sure he was STD free, like everything else, I maintained a healthy level of paranoia so I hadn't gone anywhere near his dick before. Now I had no reason to stay away. Okay, it seemed really scary, but I knew this fear was more nervousness than actually being scared and not wanting to do it.

We were in the car a good while before I managed to get up the courage to do it. He was lying on top of me, and I slid my hands down the back of his trousers and onto his bum. He started kissing my neck, so I saw this as my opportunity. If he had just been lying there, I'd have been too scared he was sitting there thinking about it. I know he'd be thinking about it anyway, but him kissing my neck would mean that his focus wasn't entirely on where my hands were going. He continued kissing my neck, much longer than he normally would, which worked perfectly for me. It took a lot of the pressure and nervousness away, and when we talked about it later, he said he'd thought I was going into his pants so he kept kissing my neck to make things easier for me. I love his perceptiveness.


I used the same strategy I'd used when I'd gone in for my first kiss, edging closer and closer. Once I got around his hips, my hands couldnt carry on the way they were, so I had to turn them around. This meant that once I eventually got up the courage to touch his dick (and the courage I needed grew considerably with each step closer I got), I was touching it with the back of my hands.

I really wish I could go back and relive this small period of time. I don't think anything of taking his dick in my hands (or assorted orifices!) now, and I'd love to relive this time when it was all new and there was the discovery and experience of it all.

My heart hammered all the time my hands were down there, but it was fantastic. It felt so naughty, and it was still scary as I was doing it, but it was great. It was so warm and squidgy! The skin on it is also completely different to anywhere else on the body too. It's thinner and softer, and if you run your fingers over it you can catch it just on your skin without trying. This makes stroking difficult but it's good for grip during a hand job :P

I had a nice, long feel about. I ran the back of my fingers up and down and around, and I went down to the balls to have a feel of what was going on down there, although the positions we were in meant I couldn't go too far down there.

At one point, I turned my hand over so I was using the front of my hand, and the added feeling I had in my fingers meant it was almost a whole new experience! It didn't last long since it just wasn't physically comfortable to have my hand like that, so I went back to using the back of my hand.

Writing this post has made me wish they could grow me some kind of giant flaccid penis in a lab to use for a pillow! I've never tried using my boyfriend's dick as a pillow, but I don't imagine he'd take well to the weight of my head crushing his dick, as well as a normal human dick being too small to provide that much of a cushion, but wouldn't it be great?

I remember going to catch the bus after that really happy that I'd done what I'd done, and enjoying the smell of his dick on my fingers! It all led to a really memorable last ever time we were in his car in the car park together. It also meant that the next time we were in bed together and I got to see it, it wasn't quite as scary for me as I'd already touched it, but that's a story for next time.